American in Palestine: "I will not be bullied or intimidated into shutting my mouth..."

by Beth Daoud in East Jerusalem

April 14, 2002

* Appeared in the www.PalestineChronicle.com on 4/15/02

 

Yesterday (Saturday) Paul Larudee and I made our way out of Nablus. Paul is a 56 year old fellow American from California. His flight from Jordan leaves Sunday, mine leaves from Tel Aviv early Wednesday morning. This will be the last time I go through the nasty, ugly Tel Aviv airport.  Leaving Nablus when I did may have been my last opportunity for quite a while.

Six people from the ISM were making their way into Nablus as Paul and I were making our way out. Mary Kelly from Ireland stayed behind to organize the new group.

Leaving Nablus through the checkpoint was difficult.  As we walked down the deserted, war torn street we encountered tank after tank. Several fired at us until they saw we were not Palestinians. I am not afraid of the Israeli soldiers. I will not be bullied or intimidated into shutting my mouth about what is happening or into not witnessing the horror in this war torn land.

It takes every ounce of restraint and discipline I have to pull myself back from the abyss of rage and anger about the injustices here. If I give into those emotions I will lose the battle I am fighting. Rage can blind a person to all reason and logic. I found this out in the devastated Old City of Nablus.

I had just spent several hours witnessing the terrible destruction of the 2000 year old buildings and homes in the Old City. I had also talked to many Palestinians who told me their stories of all they had lost. I needed to get back to the place I was staying about 2 miles from where I was standing.  Because of circumstances I would have to walk back alone.

Within a couple of blocks I became aware of a tank several blocks away pointing its huge gunbarrel directly down the street in my direction. My exit was effectively blocked.  At that moment I felt rage at everything the Israelis had stolen from the Palestinians. I felt rage at both the US and Israel for failing to see the Palestinians as human beings.  I started walking up the road towards the tank. Several Palestinians yelled at me "Le, Le (No, No)" They motioned for me to get out of the street. As I returned to my senses, I moved out of the street. It is a fine line to walk when you are in the midst of such injustice.

I am in Jerusalem now with Gary. Everything seems extremely luxurious to me right now compared to Nablus. How wonderful, a bed to sleep in, a shower, clean clothes, water, and a store to buy food in. I can no longer hear the never ending sound of machine gun fire, tank blasts, helicopter gun ships overhead, or the deafening sound of tanks coming down the street. Today I will rest and try to calm my mind. I am at the St. George church and Hotel. There are beautiful gardens in front in which I will probably stroll through tomorrow.

I am appealing to my fellow members of CCMEP and Americans everywhere. I know many of you have many responsibilities which take up most of your time. I know little time is left to work on the Palestinian issue, but your help is desperately needed. Whether you can contribute money or time (or both) to bringing peace and justice to the Palestinians, every little bit helps.

The Palestinians have no way to protect themselves. They have no rights, and are denied all expression of who they are as a people. Your support is critical to the Palestinians.

In Peace,
Beth Daoud

 

* Beth is one of four members of the Colorado Campaign for Middle East Peace who have joined internationals in solidarity with Palestinians in trying to end Israel's illegal military occupation of Palestine.  More on their trip at:  www.ccmep.org/palestine.html

 

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